Joyce James

One dark and stormy night, I trudged through the pelting rain over to my fiancé's apartment where she was entertaining a few of her Feminist friends by playing one of my "Everyday Girls Gone Wild on Spring Break!!" videos for them.  They were watching hundreds of drunken, naked girl students, wriggling around in front of huge crowds of cheering young men, everyone drinking themselves silly.  

The most aggressive and angry of the three Leftists (one self-styled "Debbie White from Wayne": heavy, short, squat, bandy-legged, cube-headed with a buzz-cut, mustachioed and horribly bepimpled) was complaining loudly.

"These damned videos demean Women!" she insisted.  "First the men get 'em loaded, then get 'em all excited and suggestible to where they give the guys whatever they want, ..... then the jerks call the girls sluts and whores!!  It's just the same old eternal exploitation.  All those bastards ought to be in jail!!"

Sitting on the floor where I cracked open my can of beer, I joined right in as if I'd been there all along.  In a calm and reasonable tone, I said:

"Now, now, Debbie, ..... if indeed these beautiful young women are demeaned in any way, they're obviously demeaning themselves ..... But personally, I think they're having a wonderful time.  They're totally immersed in an ocean of adoring men.  What could be better for a happy young girl?  I wish I could submerge myself in thousands of women who wanted me.  Pretty girls like being naked, people love them when they're naked." I looked her square in the eye, saying, "Even other women like pretty naked girls."  (She looked away then looked back again, plainly furious)  I went on, "Simply put, these beautiful young women are brave and confident enough to act out Molly Bloom's Dream."        

She looked confused, searching her mind for my meaning.  I prompted her:    

"You know, Molly Bloom's Dream.....from the end of Ulysses."      

Her face lit up a bit, and she ventured,  "Wait a minute, we took Ulysses in high school.  It was an old male-based penile-assertive novel written by some ancient Roman sexist.  Granted, I didn't read much of it, but I did skip to the end.  There was no Molly Bloom in Ulysses!"

I responded, "No, you're thinking of "The Odyssey" by the ancient Greek philosopher, Homer....."

"No way," she interrupted, "Homer is a cartoon character on TV, he's Bart's dad on the Simpsons. He didn't write The Odyssey.  You can't trick me!"            

I took a deep breath, heaved a great sigh, and said, "Homer's Odyssey was an ancient Greek allegory about a series of heroic metaphorical tasks, each of which represents a portion of the human condition.  The story culminates with Ulysses stringing his own battle bow (a very masculine symbol) which no other man could string in his place.  And it's worth a note here to mention that the Greek Goddess Diana (goddess of Wisdom and the Hunt) also carried a bow in her role of the Huntress, showing that the pursuit of Wisdom is both male and female.  As the Hunter, Diana is androgynous, as is Wisdom itself."

One of the smaller, lower-tier Feminists spoke up, "Hold on now!!  I saw an episode of Xena, Warrior Princess where Ulysses was too weak to string his own bow, so Xena helped him from under the table.  There was no Molly Bloom in that story!"  They both looked at me defiantly; they heard my coffin lid slamming shut.  I had to take another tack:          

"Look, you're right.  Homer Simpson didn't write The Odyssey, and Molly Bloom didn't help Ulysses string his bow."  They looked at each other, beaming with pride.  They'd beaten their oppressor at his own game.  I went on, "I'm talking about the Ulysses written in the 20th century.  Joyce's Ulysses, comprendé?"    

"Joyce who?!!" demanded Debbie White from Wayne.    

My brain began to fill with their concrete.  I fought against it:     

"No no, not Joyce ..... anybody.  Just Joyce, ..... the world famous Irish author who as much as invented (and pretty much perfected) the "Stream of Consciousness" style of writing.  You know, James........."

"Joyce James!  Of course!  I've heard of her!" chimed the third Leftist girlie.       

In that moment I must have gone insane.  

I yelled, "No! No! No!!  James Joyce wrote a book called Ulysses!  In that book, the Molly Bloom character finds her sexual identity in a dream where she is immersed in hundreds of penises!!  These girls on the Spring Break video are doing the same thing, Godammit!!  DON'T YOU KNOW ANYTHING!?!?!?!?"      

Their eyes widened, and I could see that there was no comprehension whatsoever in their minds.  They were blank, like TV's tuned to an empty station.  I wasn't sure of my own mind any more.       

Looking up at my flabbergasted girlfriend, I muttered "I'm gonna go out for a while.  Don't worry, I'll call before I come back........"  Then I got up and put on my coat.        

As I opened the door and walked halfway out, I heard the girls talking behind my back:  "Can you imagine his huge male ego?  Trying to convince us that Homer Simpson wrote The Odyssey, and that it was Molly Bloom instead of Xena that helped Joyce James's Ulysses with his bow.  What a dick, and I'm really glad that we steered him off his sexist views about Anne Drogynous.  I've read her stuff, and she deserves better than his typical bigoted sexist pig views......."                    

I never did go back that night.  

Agitated to my soul, I went home and right to bed where I was plagued by powerful dreams and visions.  I saw Ghouls and Lizard-folk gamboling  on the grave of Discourse; Ghosts and Demons playing Poker on the toppled headstone of History.  

Time and again, people of good political faith (and tolerance) are stymied by the utterly absurd things that  Democrats and Liberals both believe and refuse to stop believing.

Day after day, America's Democrats wallow in a morass of self-delusion and denial from which they deliberately will not extricate themselves, an emotional tar-pit designed to stop whatever political progress that opposes their own regressive, punitive agenda.

As long as they dig in and refuse to give up on foolish notions like:  George Bush stole the 2000 election, George Bush is Hitler and America is Nazi Germany, George Bush is the most evil man in the whole world; or, Capitalism is enslaving the world, Racism is everywhere, White People are devils, America is a bullying criminal terrorist nation (the most immoral nation in history); then no dialogue can move forward.  Every issue becomes moot, stymied by a hardcore obstinacy deliberately designed to end every discussion on a pejorative, Anti-American note.  (America, or George Bush, or Capitalism, is evil.  So there, case closed.)

The more this happens (and it happens more and more) their rage is amplified into a frenzy.  Finally, they froth at the mouth, spewing thousands of hate-filled invectives at every good and wholesome target in sight.  

In the end, the eyes of Truth are blackened and the Spirit of Freedom itself is strangled.

Today's Democrats are monsters.  Vile traitorous monsters, retching up their curdled political bile onto a nation (and a people) too upright and virtuous to respond in kind.  In fact, it's a tribute to the core decency of Republicans and Conservatives that these America-haters aren't just slain out of hand.

Make no mistake, beset as we are by violent enemies the world over, these intellectually ugly creatures among us are the true enemy.  If they could, they would destroy this country in blink of an eye, then dance and spit and urinate on the ashes.

http://www.towerofbabel.com/antispam/